Relationship & Singleness,  Spirituality & Purpose

He Loves Me, He loves Me Not (Part 2)

Guess you were shocked or you probably had a good laugh while reading my chronicle in part one ( ). That was me “a few years ago”! I am a living testimony of 2 Corinthians 5:17 (Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new) I still cannot believe today I can pass by a “fine Brother”, and probably acknowledge that he is wonderfully and fearfully made without assuming or guessing if he is or isn’t my Boaz. I was literally living my life for the “Boazes”. I made an idol of relationships and marriage. Presently, If I say I do not sometimes get the temptation to play “the game”, I would be a big fat liar! but even when it comes, God’s grace and love always keeps me strong and secure.

Sometimes the reason God may hide your “Boaz” from you is because the moment you meet him you might make an idol of him. God is jealous over you! (2 Corinthians 11:2- For I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy; for I betrothed you to one husband, so that to Christ I might present you as a pure virgin) He doesn’t want to lose you to something or someone that should be a blessing. I know when the pressures of society start creeping up on us, it can be difficult to focus and easy to forget God’s promises, but I encourage you to stand firm in the Fathers love regardless. When that handsome and committed brother walks up to you after service to say hello, do not be too fast to go beyond that! Resist the urge to quickly add him up on Facebook or creep into his social media pages to like all his pictures he posted since 2001! (Been there, done that!) The Bible says “He who believes does not make haste (Isiah 28:16). Many of us have gone through uninvited and unnecessary storms and heartbreaks because we assumed too quickly and failed to obey the still voice of the Holy Spirit. Personally, some guys I let into my life shouldn’t have even gone past “Hello”! but I ignored the Holy Spirit’s leading and listened to the pressures and my insecurities at the expense of my wholeness and sanity.

It is wisdom to define a “relationship” from the onset and to wisely revaluate and address any “friendship” that starts getting clouded with ‘undue’ affections. Yes, some friendships sometimes metamorphosize into marriages but also, wisdom is profitable to direct (Ecclesiastes 10:10) Just stay in sync with the Holy Spirit to know how and when to ask (not ask him out but ask him ‘what’s up?’). I am saying this because ‘some brothers’ just hang around ‘a sister’ for months and even years sometimes without saying nothing; Truth be told, it may be a harmless gesture ‘sometimes’ but ‘most times’, from experience and stories I have read and heard, it usually turns out very ugly and harmful. In all, get wisdom because you may never know if the hanging “Brother” is blocking the view of your ready and eligible “Boaz”. 

Lovely one, if you still struggle with the urge to play the “he loves me, he loves me not, game” Please, do not beat up yourself! Sometimes the waves of pressures from the biological clock and its likes can be overwhelming but trust me, God’s love is more overwhelming. Rest in the Father’s love, it would swallow up the waves of the need for you to always be on the look out for your ‘Boaz’. Your ‘Boaz’ may probably still be sleeping under the influence of a divine anaesthesia, on the operating table of the greatest surgeon; God! In due time when God is done making you from his rib, He would bring you to him. Who knows, your Boaz may even be ‘Ruth-less’ and ‘Ruth-lessly’ searching for you! (LOL) Relax, let him search for the Jewel (You). “A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10)

“Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4). Don’t be anxious, the Father knows what you need even before you ask (Mathew 6:8). You may be looking out for what you want, but God knows the exact ‘spec’ of ‘Boaz” you need! Just rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him (Psalm 37:7). He may not come when you expect him to, but trust his timing! (Ecclesiastes 3:11) Do not be like the version of me in my episode with ‘Nick’, “Do not awaken love until it so desires” (Songs of Solomon 8:4), Be wise! guard your heart! When God brings your Boaz, you won’t have to guess because he (your Boaz) would clearly and boldly define and declare his intentions, not only in words but in actions! For now, hide in the Fathers Love; it is unfailing and sure. You do not have to play ‘the game’ on it or make guesses (We love because he first loved us– 1 John 4:19). Single Lady, breathe! Seat pretty, diligently work your purpose and relax while enjoying your single days in honour of your Husband; Jesus! Thank you for reading. I love you! Stay firm in the Father’s Love.


…But to my Father,
my Father who has known me before I was birthed into this earth,
only if You should see fit.
I desire Your will above mine.
So even if you call me to a life of singleness,
my heart is content with You–the One who was sent.
You are the greatest love story ever told,
the greatest love ever known.
You are forever my judge & I’m forever Your witness,
and I pray that I’m always found on a mission about my Father’s business.

I will always be Yours,
and I will always wait for You, Lord.
More than the watchmen wait for the morning,
more than the watchmen wait for the morning,
I will wait.

– Janette…ikz (Spoken Word: I will Wait for You)

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